The Shelter

Gimme Your Honey Bucket!!!!

I’m not gonna lie: I’m a little nervous posting information about my emergency/disaster preparedness in such a public place. Yes, I can tell the world about my cocktail party, but my disaster kits are different story.

Surely you’ve seen that episode of the Twilight Zone where a family is having a gay ol’ time at a cocktail party (hey! what a coincidence!) and then they hear some government warning about UFOs and the family hosting the party runs for their fallout shelter…but then the partygoers end up ramming the shelter door open so they can get in too. Or maybe more relevant to the younger generations, that episode of the Simpsons where a comet is hurtling towards Springfield and Flanders has a bomb shelter, wherein the entire town shoves in and he ends up being the only one left outside.

Today’s American does not a have a back-up plan. Most of my friends don’t even carry a spare tire, let alone the emergency blanket, water, food, flashlight, seatbelt cutter (etc etc etc…) that I have in my car. I can’t say I’ve ever needed those items (although one time my tarp came in real handy when my coworker spilled coffee all over the seat) but when the time comes, I’ll be ready.

SOOOOO tomorrow I have a nice new shipment of supplies being delivered. Our garage has hit this point of mayhem, what with Thor’s motorcycle in pieces, and with my knee injury I haven’t been able to put things back in their spot. First off, I need a good day of just reorganizing everything. Once that’s done, I’m going to beef up our home emergency supplies. I’ve got three days of emergency water, dehydrated food, a flint fire starter kit, and a few other odds and ends coming. Really, I could wax intellectual about this stuff all day but I’ll spare you.

But here’s the deal: if you’re thinking about hitting me up when the shit goes down, keep in mind my summer goal #1 – Learn how to properly shoot a handgun (of which I will be posting about soon). Of course, not that I intend to OWN a gun of any sort, I just want to shoot one.

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