TOP FOUR QUOTES THAT DEFINE MY LIFE

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administration, bucket list, competition, education, healthy-living, teaching

Let’s just put it out there: I don’t get along with my boss. Everyone basically knows it, so let’s not play games about it. That being said, I still think I’m pretty fabulous at my job and I make every attempt to not let his droopy, down-trodden behavior get me down. This morning I had a meeting with my former Principal, who is also currently my mentor, who gave me a bit of a pep talk about my future in administration. It helped a lot, but I’m at a bit of a standstill as I search for a position for the next school year that fits my goals.

If there’s one thing all that knee surgery business taught me last year, it’s that I have the power to either make my life crappy or make my life awesome. I choose the latter. But I need inspiration to make the tough choices. Here are the top four quotes that define my life, and I probably garner some sort of determination from them on a weekly (or even daily) basis.

TOP FOUR QUOTES THAT DEFINE MY LIFE

 

John Locke – “Don’t tell me what I can’t do!”

No, really, don’t tell me what I can’t do. You can tell me things are going to be hard or confusing or even ridiculous – but once you tell me I CAN’T do something, I just want to do it out of spite. I am my own worst critic and I don’t need someone barfing their opinions about my abilities on me.

Winston Churchill – “If you’re going through hell, keep going.”

Thor hates this quote, but he also doesn’t work in a super high-poverty school where the kids call you foul names and moldy ceiling tiles fall down during passing times. This is actually my email quote. When I’ve just spent my entire morning trying to teach my students the value of being a good person and then one of them steals my lunch out of my fridge (yes, that happened last week) and my boss sends me a passive aggressive email about standardized test scores (yes, that also happened) and I want to just put my head down and look for a job in the rich part of town, I recite this quote in my head. It works.

 

Lady Gaga – “If you’re a strong female, you don’t need permission.”

I’ve had some sexist bosses in my life, and this has become my daily mantra lately. You can lean back, put your arms behind your head and stare me down in a meeting, but I’m gonna stare right back. You can rely on your inherent power as a man, but I can waste your ass in a push up competition.

 

 

Martha Stewart – “You should never accept what can be offered to you if you think it can be improved.”

I like to haggle (most people know this about me, too). If you’re buying a house or a car, bring me! But in addition to haggling about the price of an object, I also believe in haggling (or you can say negotiating if you prefer the euphemism) for what you deserve in life. While I may be extremely flexible, I also don’t settle.

 

I.AM.EXHAUSTED.

Tags

bucket list, education, goal setting, living, music, politics, teaching

Many people THINK they know what teachers do, but really, unless you’ve ACTUALLY been a teacher (and I’m mostly talking public school teacher), you have no idea how physically and emotionally taxing the job is. I am absolutely certain that if we didn’t get the summer off, the teacher suicide rate would be unreasonably high. Knowing that we have Summer Break or periodic holidays throughout the year is pretty much the only way we keep going. 

I guarantee you right now that if I didn’t have a summer vacation coming up, I would most certainly quit and find a different career. I’ve had a lot of different types of jobs (teaching was NOT my first choice as a career) and I enjoy hard work, but never had I had a job that was so  miserably hard. Then just when you let your guard down and feel like you’re doing something that really matters, you see a politician or a news article proclaiming that teachers don’t work hard enough, or don’t know how to do their jobs properly. (BTW this last week I worked 50+ hours but only got paid for 36).

Anyway, I’m bringing this up because when I made the goal to see a live show once a month, it really did seem realistic. One day out of 30 seemed totally doable. Now here it is mid-May and I have only seen ONE show.

Weekdays are out unless I take the next day off. It is scientifically impossible to teach 32 sixth graders all day without a break on no sleep. Really. My head would literally explode by lunch time. Friday nights are also virtually impossible because I’m so completely worn out that I just want to go home and lie face down. On my weekends, I squeeze in my workouts, getting groceries, and cleaning the house – so Saturday night is precious. Either I want to go out and sing karaoke with my pals, or I want to veg on the couch.

And you know what? I’m not going to feel guilty about it anymore. Sometimes you set a goal for yourself and then it just doesn’t pan out. The reality is that I’m just not 17 years old anymore (I’m also not a hipster that works part time in the service industry). I have made the decision that I would far rather go out and sing the same damned Lady Gaga song that I’ve sang 682 times before and listen to my friends sing their songs I’ve heard just as much, than hear some band I might not know very much about. 

Thus I’m going to put #18 in my back pocket and know that it’s there, but not worry about it for the moment. And frankly, I can’t imagine a show that’s going to top Lady Gaga (that is, until she comes to town on her next tour).

Almost 6:30 a mile!

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exercise, goal setting, health, living, nike, running

This morning I dragged myself out of bed at 5:30 to squeeze in a run before work. Thor, who is a seriously annoying morning person, accused me of being simultaneously grumpy and delirious because I was in a groaning stupor while pulling on my running shoes. 

In years past, my carpool buddy and I were able to leave around 7:45am and still make it to work by 8:25, which made going to the gym or working out before school doable. But this year traffic has taken a serious turn for the worse and we’ve had to fully shift our morning commute to no later than 7:15, making it really difficult to get to the gym, get back home to shower, eat breakfast and get out the door. Did I mention we rarely get home before 6:00pm? (Yeah, teachers work WELL beyond the hours they are paid).

So when I stepped out the door for my run this morning I knew I needed to move quickly to get my measly three miles in. This must have hit my psyche because I ran my fast 5k (by several minutes) and my pace for my run was 6:47/mile without even trying. BOOM! So I threw in an extra half mile for good measure. 

I’m pretty sure my new Nike Volt compression socks also had something to do with that.

Learning to throw that damned ball

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bucket list, education, fitness, goal setting, hobbies, living, sports, teaching

Back before I became a teacher, I was a nanny for rich families up on Skyline. It was a sweet gig. The kids were mostly well-behaved, I made cash money, and got to work on my tan. One of the girls I watched was an eight year old jock. We would race and play tennis and swim like crazy, but I was a giant failure because I sucked at playing catch. One time I threw the ball for their dog and she suddenly burst out into incredulous laughter, spitting out the words, “THAT’S how you throw a ball?! THAT WAS PATHETIC!” She then proceeded to throw several nearby softballs miles beyond my pathetic throw. Like over the mountains. That was the end of my throwing in public.

Today Thor gave me my first “throwing” lesson. We went over the the field next to our place with our new mitts and the baseball he gave me for Christmas (I’m the son he never had). I’ll fully admit that when it comes to throwing and catching, I’m a total girl. I’m afraid of getting hit and I have no form. The problem is, when you’re in the teaching field, you expect people to explain things to you in a really descriptive and explicit manner. 

When I work out with my trainer, she says things like, “Bend your knees more,” “Keep your chest up,” or “Keep your head up and elbows in.” That makes sense. Thor was more like, “Uhhh yeah, you gotta go like this,” and would mock throw the ball. Then I would mimic what I thought he did and go, “Like this?” And he’d say, “No. Like this!” and I would try again and he would just shake his head, “No, not like that – like THIS!“ 

Regardless, we threw the ball back and forth, and after an hour, I felt like I at least could throw the ball 30 feet without looking completely awkward. Thinking back to my nannying days, I know that distance is important to me as much as accuracy and form. So next week I’ll shoot for 40 feet!

It’s somewhat unbelievable, but the sun has continued to

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bucket list, goal setting, hobbies

It’s somewhat unbelievable, but the sun has continued to shine all week (this is generally unheard of in Portland this time of year; we might get a couple good days, but never a consecutive week!) and Thor has been on my jock to learn how to throw a ball.

Today I bought a mitt, and he had some fancy professional mitt delivered from Nike this week (because he’s expecting professional excellence from my pitches). Tomorrow is supposed to be a moderately nice Sunday afternoon, so between another pants ripping skate session and cleaning the bathrooms we will be playing some catch in the field next door. At this point, the neighbors probably think we are either the MOST AWESOME COUPLE EVER, or we are simultaneously having a mid-life crisis.

One of my neighbors happens to also be my friend and co-worker, Angela, who is also married. They do really adult things, like have dinner parties and go to the symphony and have Sunday dinner with their families. Just a few condos over, here we are watching Jersey Shore reruns and riding our skateboards in the “No Skateboarding” zone. What rebels we are.

Anyway, tomorrow we’ll start my “Learn how to throw a ball” training. Being a teacher, I’ll need some kind of baseline and measurement tool to assess my progress – I’m thinking video might be necessary, but also terribly embarrassing. 

 

Pant Rippers

Tags

bucket list, exercise, goal setting, hobbies, living, skateboarding

Well, the sun is finally shining here in Portland (for at least a few days) so yesterday we decided to get our skateboards out and take them for a ride.

But let’s take a couple steps back: Growing up, skating pretty much defined me. It sucked being the only girl I knew who skated, which meant either riding alone or hanging out with gnarly dudes. Sure, I had girl friends who would occasionally cruise with me, but they were always there to get the attention of dudes and I was really much more interested in the actual “sport” of skateboarding. On top of that, half the guys harassed me and called me a poser, or they just wanted to date me. The woes of being a girl skater.

I would pore over my issues of Thrasher in my bedroom, and constantly be scanning skate catalogues wishing I had money to purchase a new set up. Being a teenage girl, I wasn’t near as show-off as I am today and preferred to skate alone or master a trick in my driveway before taking it in public. But from the age of 13 to 24, I always had my board handy and considered it my primary mode of transportation.

Then I graduated college. Then I got married (to a guy who also skated in his former life, of course). Then I started my teaching career. Then my board got left at some dude’s house who had a ramp and I never got it back. Thor and I both lamented constantly that we wanted to get back into skateboarding. Then I blew out my knee…which REALLY sealed the deal.

So with #11: Incorporate skateboarding into my regular workouts, you won’t be seeing me grind park benches or dropping into Burnside. I have some muddy vision in my head of integrating my deck into my functional and running workouts. It sounds weird, but I have some ideas.

First step: get back on the fucking board!

Thus yesterday and today, we “shredded” our suburban whitebread condominium complex. It doesn’t get more punk rock than that. Tonight our conversation went like this:

Thor: “You think our neighborhood can handle sick rippers like us?”

Me: “Dude, we’re too old. I don’t think we can be considered rippers right now.”

Thor: “Yeah we can. Pant rippers.”

My ollie is pitiful, and my manual lasts about two seconds. Ouch. But we are having a good time and so far an hour of back-to-the-basics skating is WAYYYYYYYYYY more fun than an hour of running. And we are freaking out the old people and their little dogs. Bonus.

Coming to my arm soon – a midwestern tattoo

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art, bucket list, heather brown, hobbies, konatsu, living, tattoo, traveling, tuna can

Every summer, I head to Lawrence, Kansas to for work and it’s quite delightful. It’s a really pretty town that is very clean, has AMAZING restaurants, and everyone is so damned friendly (though I will take issue with their lack of karaoke). So my plane ticket and hotel reservations for this July are already made, but this year the trip will be a little extended. My friend, Kelly (a Kansas virgin), is meeting me on the last day of the conference and we are going to take on the midwest via a mini-roadtrip. 

When I tell people we are going to drive around Kansas and Missouri and Iowa, I get looks that vary from disgust to confusion. I’m first to admit that driving around Kansas is definitely NOT lying around the beach in Hawaii, but it has it’s merits. Last year, I wrote a post about randomly exploring Kansas City with a new Canadian friend I met in a workshop, which has now inspired me for this year’s trip.

We don’t know exactly what we are going to do, but Kelly lives in Nevada, we rarely see each other, and we were great traveling partners in Hawaii a few years back. One thing I DO hope to get done is get a tattoo on our trip. At this point, I haven’t found a reputable tattoo shop but I’ll do some yelping and possibly talk to the locals. I’m also not someone who puts a lot of thought into my tattoos; it’s more of an aesthetic thing than a “I’m representing this moment/person/ideology” thing.

While in Hawaii, we came across the art of Heather Brown, who does surf art and I instantly thought the style would make a good tattoo. One of my last tattoos was the same deal. I brought the work off an artist, Konatsu, to my tattoo artist and he drew up a really great piece. That being said, Portland is like tattoo central (the joke is that you can’t drive 0.5 miles without running into a tattoo shop, strip club, or donut shop). Anyway, here’s some of Heather Brown’s work and I hope she wouldn’t be pissed that I want to copy it.

Putting those homeade marshmallows to use…

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cooking, hobbies, hot chocolate

#6: Learn How to Make Marshmallows from Scratch. Check.

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baking, bucket list, cooking, hobbies, marshmallows

Last Saturday, I blocked off my entire afternoon for two things: a massage, and making marshmallows. 

Straight off, I knew I wanted to make two batches. The first would be strictly by the book, and I was hoping to make flavored marshmallows for the second. I simply googled “Homeade Marshmallow Recipe” and followed the first thing to pop up: GET THE RECIPE HERE.

I don’t generally like baking a whole lot because it is such a science, and I more prefer to tweak recipes, or simply make them up as I go. I also suck really bad at reading directions (Thor says it’s one of my most annoying traits). However, this recipe was relatively painless and using the thermometer somehow made it more fun. The first batch turned out pretty perfect, and I was surprised how fast the fluff set once in the baking pan. The second batch tasted fine, but because I tried to split the batch in half at the last second to make half cinnamon and half mint, they set too soon and were almost impossible to spread out in the baking pan. Note to self: stick with the damned recipe.

Today, I took them all to school and had my students vote anonymously on their preferences. Plain was the winner (and I agree), but mint came in a close second. Upon tasting mint, another teacher remarked, “It tastes like toothpaste. I mean that in the best possible way.”

 

 

I must say that homeade marshmallows taste significantly better than store bought, but I consider myself somewhat of a marshmallow connoisseur. The biggest challenge was cutting them apart. I do NOT recommend the pizza cutter like the recipe suggests. Today a coworker suggested I use cookie cutters (and she’s pretty much the best cook I know in person) so I think I’ll try that next time – but I feel confident that I will submit marshmallows to the state fair in August.

Principal for a Day Round Two

Tags

administration, careers, education, goal setting, school, teaching

Today I spent my day at a nearby school with the intention of shadowing the principal – a wonderful woman who used to be my boss several years ago, and I am ever grateful because she took a chance on hiring me for my first teaching job. I’ve been to her school several times, but never during the school day because I am busy teaching myself.

She was not there when I arrived, and after being there less than ten minutes, I was suddenly told that the principal had a serious emergency and I was in charge. Ok, I thought, now it gets interesting. I knew the names of virtually no one (staff and students), had no clue which rooms belonged to which teachers, when lunch started or ended…not even where to go to the bathroom.

But I’m not a panicky kind of person; if anything, these kinds of situations are what I like. At the end of the day I was sitting next to the resident police officer for the neighborhood (he was just visiting, thank god) and he said, “Sooooo you want to be a principal someday, eh? You like putting out fires?” And I replied, “Actually…yeah…that’s exactly what I like.”

I’m convinced that is why I have stayed at my current school for so long. It is a high poverty school that never seems to catch a break. It is the most diverse school in Oregon, with over 35 languages spoken, which is pretty amazing since we are the whitest metropolitan city in the country. Every year my classroom has kids who are homeless; some of the kids have never sat at a desk all day because they are refugees from other countries; many have parents that never graduated high school. But that’s what makes it fun, believe it or not.

Many teachers leave after one or two years because they can’t handle the untamed energy (I’ve now been there long enough to watch this cycle). I don’t blame them a bit, but I don’t envy them either. We joke that those of us who have stayed must crave dysfunction in our lives, because who the  hell would stay in a school where the kids swear at the teachers and fight with each other and steal from the school that literally feeds them everyday? So yes, I like to put out fires. 

Pretty much every job I’ve ever had required me to problem solve at mach speed (waitress, customer service, etc). When I first graduated college, I thought grant writing would be a great career, but then when I got the job I realized sitting on my ass in a cubicle waiting for someone to make conversation at the water cooler was just NOT MY JAM. I like to run around, fix things, placate people, yell directions…and then kick back a beer with like-minded individuals at the end of the day.

Today was a good day because the staff was terribly friendly and the kids were excited to see a new face, and I knew that I could have handled about a dozen more fires than they threw at me.